pain

The Mirror And Reflections On Inner Beauty

Painting by Fatima Ronquillo

It was 4am
When I told myself
I don’t like me
And I looked into the mirror
And I saw
A fat body
With a very average face
A face that didn’t
Turn heads

It was 4am
When I asked
Why am I not like those models?
So I look away
And I see my thighs
The girth of it
It was almost like
An elephant
Wearing clothes

It was 4am
When I cried
Is this why he left me?
So I put on makeup
And a dress which
Covers my thighs
And rolled my hair up
And I smiled at the mirror
Looking still fat, still average

It was 4am
When In pain I said
“Will I never be enough?”
And I kept crying
At my imperfections
At my flaws
At my average face
At the girth of my thighs
And my untoned belly

It was 4am
When I wondered
Is this who I am?
My face
My stomach
The birthmark on my neck
My crooked teeth
My bitten nails
And my dark complexion

It was 4am
And it was then that I knew
I’m not perfect, and it’s fine.
Because even if
I forget it sometimes
And I may think otherwise
But my hips are not me
My dark complexion
Just can’t be me

It was 4am
When I realised
That the mirror lies
That
There will always be people
Judging you
Not for who you are
But for
What you are

 

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Written by Shireen Dan

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‪#‎BeBravelySincereWithYourself‬
30DaysChallenge. Day 3.
“What do you see when you look into the mirror?”

 

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