pain

About Living In A Country Where You Are Nothing Without Marriage

Photo by Nick D. Woods

In my country
I was taught to be uncomplicated
Because then maybe I will find someone who will fall in love with me
And we will have a long lasting marriage
Because that’s what is most important
I was taught to pray to find a capable husband
Because then I won’t have to work anymore
And nothing is more important
I was taught to keep myself in my best shape
Because then someone will pick me over the others
And I can finally belong to someone and have children
Everything else can wait
Wait
Wait
Wait
I cannot wait
I have had enough of being expected to have someone else
I have grown tired of being judged on my capabilities to have and keep a relationship
You want me to be perfect
And to you that means getting fucking married, staying fucking married and having kids and giving up the fucking job
You tell me, it’s so I would be able to live an easy life
Oh right, “if I’m lucky”
Well let me tell you what I think even though you won’t listen and deny me anyway
Perfect to me are those who have found happiness
Lucky to me are those who are able to keep it
I have no interest in living a life where I cannot be complicated or keep my job or have my body be what I want it to be
I want what every man has; freedom – the ability to choose which responsibilities I want, the acceptance of having complications and imperfections, and don’t even get me started about safety
I want whatever makes me happy, without your expectations forcing me to stay within the lines
I want what every man already has but every woman has to fight for
I want a life that is my own, not everybody else’s
And I cannot wait.
Submitted to ArtParasites by Anaya

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