love

A Letter To Loveless Singles

Photo by Brock Elbank

Photo by Brock Elbank

Read this now if you feel in anyway lonely and loveless. Read this at night when you’re over-thinking; especially if you’re over-thinking about love and wondering if you’ll ever have a real chance in it. Read this as a consolation to know that somehow, somewhere, maybe on the other end of the globe, someone is having the same feelings.

I open Facebook and scroll through my feed to see a friend has got engaged. My heart flies with happiness for her, because I know she and her fiancé were in love way before this engagement I’m glad they’re getting married.

A few days later I check my Facebook again to find another friend has got engaged, but this time there’s no love – it’s an arranged marriage.

Still, she looks happy and for some reason I think she’s not faking this happiness, or maybe I’d just like to think so.

However, I guess she’s glad to have someone to be there for her, someone who wants her even more than she might want him. Maybe that can be enough.

Those two friends made me to think about myself, which story would I want to have.

When you are single for too long you kind of get used to it in a way; at least you get used to the idea that most single people share the similar experiences, like valentine’s day, which you either spend with friends celebrating your bachelorism or with a tub of ice cream and bag of chips luxuriating in a bun and pajamas, probably watching some Valentine’s Day movie and making fun of how single you are. Other days, you go pamper yourself with some fancy dinner on your own with a proud feeling of how happy you are despite being single.

But to be honest, single people also share concerns. Almost every single woman and man worries about for how long they will remain single, not that they can’t live with it or that that sort of relationships is their ultimate life goal, but because of no one can deny what mutual passionate love could add into one’s life.

I see how we define single people as strong and how some underestimate this strength, but the truth is that it’s real strength especially for the ones who refuse to change this status just because they’re still waiting for the magical love, the dream that we all know isn’t realized for everyone. Its a gift that chooses us and for those brave hopefuls: you are not alone in this, someone out there is also waiting for someone to appreciate him. Someone out there, like you, is waiting for another who wants to talk about favorite books. They long to debate, not necessarily to win the debate, but to explore the other persons mind more. They yearn to discover life with another person and to discover someone who makes ordinary things seem new.

Someone out there still hopes that just because love hasn’t shown up in a while, that it doesn’t mean love doesn’t exist. Someone out there is waiting too.

If you feel you are wasting your time waiting for the unknown to come (as if we know anything about our future) then choose the known if it looks more safe, choose the one who loves you over the one you love. But if you are still suffer from fantasies about love and somehow believe in it:
Wait, tolerate being single a bit more, and choose wisely the one you’d want to continue the road with. Choose someone you wouldn’t mind growing up with, someone you’d want your kids to grow up like, someone who even if you didn’t manage to love can’t help but cherish and look into their eyes with gratitude.

Choose someone whose goodness might even drive you to love them without noticing.

I, myself, don’t want to change my mind. I don’t want to stop believing that someone will love me one day the way I deserve to be loved

And though I joke with my friends, telling them that no one loves us, I still think that maybe if not now, someday someone will love us. Someday we’ll get that lucky and there’ll be a loving heart for each one of us.

Mariem Sherif is an Egyptian medical student who believes that words can heal a wound, that in each and every one of us there is something special and that in details lies another great different life for those who notice.