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A Dad’s Open Letter To His Daughter’s Groom

Cloud by  Yang Cao

Cloud by Yang Cao

Today it is the happiest and the saddest day of my life. Today is the day I have dreaded the most since the time I held her first. From tomorrow I will no longer be the only man in her life. Today I give you a piece of my heart, today I give you my daughter.

I still remember the day that little angel walked into my life. The day I took her in my arms and realised that nothing is going to be the same. She was so small. I loved the way her little fingers wrapped around my fingers. I loved how her smile made even the worst of my days bearable. I loved everything about her.

I don’t have the pictures of the first time she started crawling, or stood on her feet, or started walking – but if you ask me I still have the memory of that exact moment – intact in my mind. Everyday after returning from work, I would take her out. To show her the night sky. She would be full of awe – every time she looked that sky full of stars. “Papa, does anyone go into the sky and touch the stars ? When you go on a plane next can you get me one of those stars ?” – she would tell me in her broken voice, and that innocence would always fill my heart. Her amusement, her dreams – I always thought they were so different.

Don’t get me wrong son, but I have raised my daughter a little differently. I never raised my voice while I spoke to her, I never shouted at her. Even when she came home late, I spoke calmly. I never tried to impose my opinion on her,I just discussed my opinion and heard her take on things. I never spoon fed her on what is right and what is not – I told her stories and situations and let her figure out the black and the white for herself. Her conscience is her own – so its strong . I taught her how to think, how to be independent.

I was never opposed to her having guy friends. Neither did I ever question her judgement on what dresses she wore – she is an independent woman – she can decide that for her own. The time when she wanted to go for that trip with her school friends – I let her go. The time she wanted to attend university thousands of miles away from home – however much it pained me to see her go – I let her. I have had complete faith in her, complete trust – always.

But these are little things. I have raised her differently in certain other ways too. Son, my daughter is not the best cook. She can cook the basic stuff – yes. But please don’t expect her to be an expert chef from Day 1. All those years when you were busy studying for your university – she was busy doing the same. She has gone through the same stress level, the same coursework, the same stringent requirements of the education system for her degree. There was just no time for her to spend on improving her culinary skills. But I promise you, she is going to try. She is going to try her best to cook the best she can for you. But don’t judge her if her chapatis are not round, or if the vegetable contains a little too much salt – appreciate the efforts she puts in for you.

Son, also I implore you to remember that she works as much as you do, has same career aspirations as you do, has same work stress as you do. But knowing my daughter, I know she will not complain. She will still come back home after a long day at work and cook for you. She is going to do your laundry, and she is going to clean the house. She is going to take care of your pet. She is going to own everything you own. She will try her best to give you as much time as she can everyday. But I request you to not take her for granted. It will be great if you can help her with the domestic chores. It will not make you look any weaker, it will just tell her that you really care about her.

I have raised my daughter a little differently. She will like to help you with your finances, she will want to help you with your professional life. I have known her for a very long time, and I know for a fact that she has pretty good ideas. She has sound judgement of situations and people. I request you to listen to her opinion, her say, in the big and the small matters. I implore you to let her speak. There might be some days when she will be working late, and might come home late. I request you to trust her.

I have raised my daughter a little differently. She is going to have her own set of friends, the people she hangs out with. That doesn’t mean that she will not socialize with your friends. But please don’t ask her to leave her group of friends. They are those people whom she has known for a lifetime. The people who have shaped her life and played an important role in making her the woman she is today.

Son, she might become moody sometimes, she might ask you for more of your time, she might ask you for more attention. Please don’t fight with her if she does, please don’t get irritated. She just wants to be in your life a little more, she just wants you to share everything with her, like she does with you.

Son, she is my priceless possession – and if I had a choice, I would never give her away. My daughter is lucky to have found you, the man of her dreams. And I am sure that you are a very good man, Son, as my daughter today chose to leave everything behind and be with you. She chose you – and I trust her judgment. Please take care of her as I did, let her be herself even after she becomes yours.

Today it is the happiest and the saddest day of my life. Today is the day I have dreaded the most since the time I held her first. From tomorrow I will no longer be the only man in her life. Today I give you a piece of my heart, today I give you my daughter.

Submitted to ArtParasites by Shivee Chauhan