melancholy

To The Next Girl Who Falls In Love With Him

Art by Eritrea Studio, designed for our cover photo illustration contest

Art by Eritrea Studio, designed for our cover photo illustration contest

That boy is something else, isn’t he? You probably did a double take when you first saw him. Perhaps you gushed about him to your friends non-stop the first time you stayed up all night talking to him. I know, I’ve been there. It probably feels weird reading this right now, but I just want to you to know a few things about this boy whom you can’t seem to get out of your head, and maybe even share a few advices for when he frustrates the life out of you.

First, I want you to know that you are in for a heck of a ride. Loving him will be one of the most exhilarating experiences of your life. I had the privilege of sharing 13 months of love, life and adventure with him, and it’s safe to say that those were some of the best months of my life. I hope you’ll hold his hand and let him know you’ll be beside him as he explores new places, discover new things and meet new people.

Also, I hope you’re at least half as weird as him. Once he gets comfortable with you, there’s no telling what sort of crazy things he might start doing. Be prepared to see dozens of photos of him doing all his weird but extremely cute faces. Each one of them is still etched on my brain, and they still make me laugh every now and then. Please roll with it and be yourself around him, too.

Create funny dance steps with him and laugh at yourselves when your little brother catches the both of you dancing without any music. When he runs out of things to say, he’s going to say something like “bananas,” and the best you could do is send him some random fruit emoji.

Play with his face and create all sorts of ugly faces. Take tons of embarrassing pictures of him and refuse to delete them. Chances are, he’s got a handful of embarrassing photos of you, too. Have tickle fights with him even though you know you’ll lose, and just have fun with him.

Of course, it’s not always rainbows and butterflies. There are going to be times when you would want to tear all your hair off in frustration. Please be a bit more patient and understanding with him. Understand that silence is his way of coping with his anger and frustration. He might not want to talk to you immediately after a fight, but please be patient. Let him have a day off after a fight. He will always come back to you.

It’s best not to start a fight simply because he forgets to reply when he’s busy playing billiards with his friends. If you’re there with him while he’s playing, always stay close to him and talk to his friends. He wouldn’t want you to feel left out. Play with him when he offers, or ask him to teach you how to play; he’d be more than happy to do so. Kiss him when he wins a game. Kiss him even when he doesn’t. Be his ultimate cheerleader.

He drives now. I never got to sit shotgun and he never got to pick me up for a date, but I hope you’ll appreciate these little things. He was always excited about being able to fetch me from school and drive to different places, and now he’ll be able to do that with you. Always remember to thank him for it.

Embrace his love for photography. Be his go-to model and give him your honest opinion when he shows you his shots. Go to museums and exhibits with him and fall in love with art as much as you are falling in love with him.

Go the extra mile for his birthday. Chances are he won’t be having a party, and you’ll be the only one who can make him feel like it’s his birthday. You don’t have to give him anything extravagant. He’ll understand if you can’t afford it. Give him bubbles and a toy car for all he cares— it’s being with you on his special day that matters most.

Whatever happens, please don’t try to change him. If he loves you enough, he’ll be willing to compromise some things, but please never try to change him. Accept him completely for who he is. That means accepting his fears, his vices, his past, and his tendency to forget to text you about where he is and what he’s doing. Just remember that you are not perfect, too. You have your flaws yet there he loves you just as you are. And if you’re lucky enough, he might start to change himself for the better, without you forcing it.

Finally, love him as much as you can, for as long as you can. He is one of the most charming, annoying and intoxicating human beings you will ever meet and he is just so beautiful.

Know that you are blessed to have been given the chance to love him and be loved by him. If in the end, however, love ends up falling short and you find yourself at the end of your story with him, gently let him go with a smile on your face and thank him for all the wonderful memories you shared together.

You are allowed to mourn over lost love and cry yourself to sleep for a whole week, but know that it gets better. I hope that like me, you can look back fondly at all the times you spent together and know for sure that the happiness he brought into your life was so much more than the sadness that came after.

I hope that like me, you will be thankful for that boy with the perpetually sleepy eyes who taught your sleeping heart how to truly live and love.

Written by Patricia Galang