pain

To The Love Who Told Me Will Come Back For Me But Never Did

Painting by Vincent Giarrano

Painting by Vincent Giarrano

I waited. I told myself to keep still and wait patiently for you because I believed that good things take time and you were just too good that I must wait longer because I believed that you will come back and when you do, you will never leave again.

Days got a bit longer, months passed and still, I haven’t received any response from you, any sign that you still remember what we are to each other. I promised you that I will always remember no matter how long, no matter what happens, no matter how unsure you are of your  feelings; I will wait.

You see, I waited–for your response, for answers, for your attention, for your time, for your love. I believed in your words because I thought I knew you well enough, because I trust you, because I love you. I never got your answers, though. You dropped me out of your life like a bomb you’ve carried so carefully only to let it fall and burst into pieces without care, without damage control. You never spoke a word to me. It was as if we didn’t happen.

After all, I still clung onto that meager light of hope that you would still reach out, I thought I just have to wait a bit more. But you never did so I had to gather the courage to make the first move because I badly want the answers from you needless of how painful it may be; I just have to know but you never heaved an explanation. I knew then, I was waiting in vain.

Maybe it wasn’t your intention to tear me apart neither was it my liking to let tears swell up my eyes. You see, I’ve loved you.

After all the hurt and disappointment has ebbed away, I learned that love will never leave you hanging. Love will never make you feel inadequate. Love will never leave you doubting. Love will never have to come back for you because love will never leave you. Love will never ask you to beg for time or attention because love will give it to you freely and whole-heartedly because love knows that you deserve it and that you deserve nothing less.

Thank you because I learned that love is an everyday “choosing.” It’s a choice you make every time you wake up in the morning and it’s the same choice you make when it’s sunny and even when it’s dull and raining.

Submitted to ArtParasites by AllTheOddsAndEnds