How To Silence The Mean Voices Inside Our Heads And Replace Them With Positive Thoughts

GIF by xianzhong

GIF by xianzhong

Sometimes, I imagine our heads are like these giant warehouses of voices, different kinds of voices that keep whispering and shouting; demanding to be heard, to be released and be acted upon. Some of these voices are unworldly artistic muses inspiring us to create some form of art. Other voices are dark, self-demeaning and destructive. Ugly noises inside your head that you wish too desperately to shush but can’t. They just won’t keep quiet or be still. Voices that put hurdles along your path and disturb your peace of mind. They show up out of nowhere, and besiege all your thoughts, occupy every corner of your brain till you can’t hear but them, till you can’t escape. Voices that disarm you of all the shields you had against your fears and lay them bare before you, just as ugly, just as terrible, till you surrender and give up on all hopes of surviving your battle against them.

I have them too – these dark voices – and I thought if I could talk them out off my chest, maybe I’d be setting them and myself free. Maybe this way, they wouldn’t haunt me or bother me as much as they do.

So, let me introduce you to my voices; the voices that dwell inside my head and might sometimes stay at yours.

1- You’re not good enough:

Well, that’s the most incessant of them all, the loudest and all-the-time present. It’s been there with me since my adolescent days up till now and I can’t figure out the reason why it ever started. All I know is that when I fall under its teeth, I feel left out, depressed and lonely. It erodes my self-confidence and nearly destroys my self-esteem. It keeps telling me that everyone is better, everyone is handsomer, everyone is more capable, it always puts me in the “less” list.

You should never fall prey to that voice because it will ultimately stop you from living the life you want, the life you deserve. Do your best to conquer it, shift your focus from the dark side it tries to keep you in, into the bright side of you that it overshadows. Take your eyes off the negatives and see into the positives. Try to remember every single compliment you had, every small achievement you pulled through, all the little victories you managed to accomplish throughout your life.

Above all, remember that perfection doesn’t really exist; it’s something sought but never reached. So, just be yourself and stop comparing yourself to people or measuring your worth according to their standards. Everyone is good in their own way and you’ll only be unique as long as you’re different. Deafen that voice now; you’re ENOUGH.

2- You’re a loser:

And here it is that other screaming voice that plays in my head a record of all my past failures and all the things I couldn’t and still can’t manage to do in my life. It usually starts to whisper inside my head when I’m about to venture into something new or try to step out of my comfort zone. It’s there to remind me that I just “can’t” and that whatever I do will end up in a big pile of trash. This voice also keeps getting louder and louder especially if you’re surrounded by people who reinforce it, those energy-suckers who keep pointing out your flaws and imperfections to undermine your true potentials of success.

So, to overcome that voice, first you have to get rid of these people no matter how attached you are to them. Block the bad energy they emit and welcome the good one, shining from those who encourage you to do better, to be better. Then, you’ll have to defy your scared self and just push it forward into new challenges and risks. Someone once said: “If it feels too scary to jump, that’s exactly when you jump. Otherwise, you end up staying in the same place your whole life.” Do not let the fear of failing trap you into a life that always feels like a prison you need to escape from.

3- You’re invisible:

Do you ever imagine yourself dying and being forgotten! That nobody will actually notice your absence! That people will know it by chance that you left this world, mumble a few sad words and just get on with their lives forgetting that you’ve ever existed!

Do you ever have this fear of being unfelt, unknown, and unimportant to others! That whether present or absent, nobody feels it and nobody really cares!

I’ve always had this feeling of being unseen and this scenario of dying unnoticed is almost unstoppable in my head. It hurts a lot especially when you care so genuinely about other people.

But eventually we have to come to terms with the fact that we’ll all one day cease to exist and be ultimately forgotten. What will really matter then is the good we’ve managed to do during our lives because that’s what will make us well-remembered and truly missed. Be good to people, be there for them in their good and bad, help them in their times of need, forgive them if they do you wrong. And do all that waiting for nothing in return, knowing that when good deeds and good intentions go hand in hand, they create a memorable existence, hard to be forgotten or pass unnoticed.

These are some of the voices that keep nagging me and pulling me down into the furnace of life and might be doing the same to you too. And all I have to say is that we have to fight them to the end, we should never let them take control of our lives or steer our ship of existence because they’ll most definitely lead it to doom. 

“Whatever you do, you must never let the voice in your head control the brain in your heart.” Steve Jobs

Written by Jihad Mahmoud