love

A Thank You Letter To the Young Man Who Appreciated Me Despite the Huge Age Gap

Painting by Henri De Toulouse Lautrec

Painting by Henri De Toulouse Lautrec

Young man, you made me feel special.

Special enough to be seen and admired even by the most innocent eyes of yours. I am thankful for the reality that someone so fresh and new to the world of loving gets to appreciate who and what I am. Though I may never be certain of what exactly you found in me, I am sure about how I felt–and still feeling to be honest–when I learned about your admiration. This is not due to some narcissistic inclinations caused by the series of weird bipolar episodes following my last heartbreak from May. This, I believe, is because I am sincerely flattered that someone so frail can see me as some kind of inspiration.

I am happy because despite the society’s unsaid yet existing inhibitions on decade-long age gaps, you managed to see through the shallowness and crept through the usual system. When I learned about you, it made me feel grateful I am me. It made me grateful I am still me.

I also want to take this chance to admit, somehow, that I like you. While it may not be appropriate for me to say that, especially considering that we are being hindered by the opinionated world behind us. This is me trying to tell you that it’s okay to like someone beyond the society’s seemingly strict age standards on loving and relationships. I hope you retain that free spirit all through your life. i hope, too, that in the future, you fall for the nicest girl as well. Someone who will take care of you just as how much I know you will lovingly take care of her. And whether or not that will be me, I am here to wait alongside with you for what our fate is headed to.

I just want you to bear in mind that people will always judge because that’s just the nature of this world we live in, but I hope that will never damage the way you see things. Please believe me when I say that I want you to have a good life not only because you had the guts to tell the world you admire me despite the consequences but also because people like deserve the best. I am thankful to be a part of your life, of the learning process you’re in. I am thankful that this simple incident created a whole new understanding in my system as well. I hope we can become friends. For real. So that I can personally take care of you and make sure that you’ll be on the right track. But the choice isn’t mine to make. I do hope anyway that you’ll be better off with or without me.

This letter is to encourage you to stay who you already are right now, as there is much potential for you to be a good man someday. Far off better perhaps than most of the men I have already met. You made me grasp the reality that age does not really matter, and that it should never ever matter because we are all entitled to our own choices of feelings and people to love.

Thank you for making me see and take hold of the idea that it is not about what biological age you’re in, but about the level of maturity you’re in for.

People like you, I’ve decided, should be protected. Probably like an endangered species in the wild–because that is seemingly exactly like what you are.

I hope the world will handle you with utmost care.

I will.

Written by Carriza Rana