love

A Poem For Everyone Caught Up In This Black And White World

Artwork by Henn Kim

Artwork by Henn Kim

They wanted me to be clear.
To decide what I want. 
A number.
A word.
An instance.
But how do I decide?
How much of the sky I want?
How much of the Earth?
How much of the feeling after immersing myself in hours of work?
How many days of rest?
A room full of happiness.
A ray of sorrow.
Peace.
Undertones of discord,
Chaos
and
Confusion.
How do I decide which part of the sea feels more like home?
How do I detangle a million strands of my voluminous hair?
I want it all and none.
Everything at once.
Nothing at all.
I want the
Oxymorons,
Contrasts
And
Contradictions.
End.
        Beginning.
Ravages from start to end.
Abundance.
        Sarcity.
Company.
          Aloofness.
Courage.
          Cowardice.
The man who is afraid to lose me.
The man who doesn’t care to hold on.
The parallel Universes.
The colours of a different sky.
The sanctity of love.
Dark lanes of lust.
A little bit more of life.
Then some more of death.
But NO,
I must,
CHOOSE.
       DECIDE.
DECLARE.
         BE CLEAR.
“So you want the black or the white?”
“I don’t know! I don’t know!”
I want the grey!
I want the grey!
 
Written by Avnika Gupta